Pettiest Break Up Revenge Stories - The ideas you didn't know you needed!

You are listening to the Girls Get Off podcast. How has your week been, Jo, before we dive into our topic? Yes, good. As always, the download with them and Jo reminds me of just how boring my life is right now. Not much to share, apart from I can't get my head around the fact I have a 16-year-old. crazy. 16 years ago you were pushing a baby out. I know. Yeah I don't know whether it's I feel too young to have a 16 year old now I feel a whole lot older. It's thrown me a bit. You are quite young to have a 16 year old though there can't be that many like parents your age at school. Is there or not? I literally thought you were about to say you're old. Okay. No, well, I'm the same age as most of Arlo's, my six year old parents. Yeah. So the parents at his school, that's I'm like the kind of age, but yeah, Jake's 10 years older than that. So I'm quite a young one. Yeah, that would make more sense I feel. Yeah, but anyway, that's all right. You've got an in-house babysitter, so it works well. Oh, I know, right? I know. One of the other exciting updates that we had this week was I was actually surprised when this happened. I got a notification that I had a parcel to pick up so went up the hill to go and get it and the lady handed it to me and said, what is this? It's very heavy and it feels like liquid. And I was like, I have no idea what this is. And then I realized that I got a box of AfterBanger, AKA the new toy cleaner that the audience named sent to me first. And it was a box full of after being it, which was so exciting. And it just looks amazing. Like it's, it's so chic. It's so cool. It's going to match juicy and it will be available in November in Australia, probably end of November and start of December in New Zealand. So stay tuned for that. Again, our, I think we're getting known for our bad communication skills around the office. Um, how. That was me that sent them to your address and didn't give you the heads up. They were coming. So glad you got a nice surprise. And I put it on the Instagram stories saying, I think this could be the toy cleaner that everyone named. And then I thought if it's not, it's going to be awkward. I don't know what it is, but it was, so that was good. Massive update. This is probably the product. Well, it is the product we have worked on the longest. out of anything. Like I feel like it has been in the pipeline for at least a year. Am I right, Viv? Oh yeah. At least a year. At least a year. More than a year because I was in New Zealand still when we were formulating this. Oh my gosh. Wasn't I? I'm sure I was. And so that would have been over a year and a half ago. So it's a long time ago. Wow. Yeah. This has been a long time coming because it's one thing, the audience, you guys, the community, everything, everyone has been wanting. And so we needed to get it right. A libido supplement. So. Yeah, and all of a sudden we're at this stage where we think we're going to be able to release it before Christmas. So exciting. And I guess for the background and, you know, we're very known for our toys, especially Missy, but the reason we decided to go down this path was because when we asked our audience quite a while ago, and it's popped up time and time again in the Facebook group, and it's been this ongoing theme, we asked everyone, what is the one thing? that would improve your sex life. And other than people saying someone to have sex with or if my husband did the housework or the dishes, the most common thing that they came back with was questions around libido and improving libido and boosting their own libido. So we've come up with something that will do just that. And I think it's safe to say we are pumped. We are pumped. Can we give the name of this one? I love the name of this one. Okay, this one's gonna be called Afternoon Delighters. I don't know why I think of Anchorman. You know that Afternoon Delight song? Oh my gosh, we're gonna have a field day with that one on socials. Yeah, and any updates from you personally, Viv? How's your week been? My week's been good. I went on a date, wasn't really attracted to them, but that's fine, so that's all good. It's a numbers game. And then I actually had this really funny interaction with a new friend of mine and She had been around at her new like well they've been seeing each other for five or six months like in a relationship and then she'd seen that He had messages on his iPad pop up from another girl. So she thought okay Should I bring it up right now? He was making dinner. Should I bring it up right now or should I just leave? and she thought, you know what, fuck it, I'm just gonna go. So she left, she messaged him, said that like, I'm so done, you had your chance. Also when they first started seeing each other, she said, she had known he was, maybe he was like still on the apps or something and she said, look, if you wanna see me, then you've gotta see me, like, I'm not here for, you know, any half-assed stuff. So she'd said that right at the beginning and then obviously, you know, five or six months down the track, she's in this situation. So she messaged him saying, this is done, this is over, you're gonna die alone, et cetera, et cetera. She's obviously quite angry. She's like, and then she blocked him on everything. She's like to me, he's missed out on someone amazing. She's like, obviously this is quite hard, but like he had his chance, blah, blah. I feel like all too often, I'm sitting in the situation where I hear of, friends of mine or people that I know just accommodating for less than desirable behavior or bad behavior and I never, I realized sitting there that I have never been in a situation where someone has got five or six months down the track with someone and then fully been lightened up and just come from a super secure place of being like, that's catch you later. I've like never, I was like, the scariest thing here is that I've never experienced this. I was like, A, I've never experienced this, and then B, my friends don't even get into relationships for five or six months. Like it doesn't even get that far in the first place. I was like reflecting and I was like, who do I even know in a relationship? And I was like, yeah, I've got some friends, but like not many. Like I would say that in terms of like watching my friends, my close friends like get into relationships, there has been very few. over the years. And yeah, it was fascinating. I was like, A, to this person, I was like, A, this is amazing. And obviously it's still hard for her, but I was like, B, I'm more like gobsmacked that I'm like, I've never experienced this before. Like I'm used to hearing about people who've taken people back or, you know, they're like, oh, he's gonna change. Making excuses for their behavior and stuff, hey. Making excuses, just like, and you're just like, worn down, just worn down by it, or like even people that aren't in relationships and maybe they're just, starting to see someone and then they're just like, they're obviously not communicating things with people. And like, I've totally done this before where you're like, oh, it'll be fine, it'll be fine. And you're just like not creating good boundaries and not making sure all your needs are met. But it's been quite the eye-opener, but it's been such a good learning experience. It's been amazing. Yeah, go her. And also, I was with her and I was leaving to go to the gym. and I said, oh, she was about to take the rubbish out and I said, oh, would you like me to, do you want me to take that down? Like, cause I'm already leaving. And she was like, no, it's his stuff. And she was walking his stuff out in a trash bag because he was outside, which was just the icing on the cake. Oh my gosh, I love her. Amazing. So let that be a lesson, which is easier to learn when there's no, easier to learn and observe when there's no emotion involved, you know, like when you're in that situation. But anyway, so better living everyone. There's a hot tip for your week. And what a tip. Don't even let them come inside to grab their stuff because they will weasel their way back to you. She left him outside. Yeah, and then I think he did come inside. to chat, but then I said, how did it go? And she's like, yep, he was really upset. She's like, I'm proud of myself. I didn't even cry. I was like, this is wild. She's like, he's got to sort his life out. I told him he needs to go to therapy, blah, blah. I was like, wow, this is so good. He needs to teach us all. I know, I know. So anyway, there's some- How old is she? 23. Stop. Yeah, 23. Got that security at 23, go. Yeah, so there you go. There's a learning curve for you. Love that. Well, that kind of, that's a great lead in to today's episode because we just wanted to hear wild revenge stories. We've asked our audience to share some with us and they did not disappoint. I think I put this story up just a couple of hours ago and like, we are scrolling through pages of revenge stories. Not that girl was very revengeful. But she was great. Okay. Do you want to, do you want to start or do I've got a good one? Okay. You start. This is wild. I should have like specified that we don't really want to hear anything too illegal on here, you know, like I don't want, I don't want the cops to be contacting us and being like, can we get the name of that person? No, they won't. Anyway. Um. Yes, all is anonymous, but this one kind of made me spit out my drink before. She tipped bleach all over his lounge to wash off another slut's dinner. Stop. That is extreme. So extreme. I know. That's just full vandalism. I think. That is like a whole knitting to replace all the carpet and imagine over the couch and stuff like that is one angry girl. Wow. Yeah. I actually haven't read the ones that you sent through to me so you guys are hearing this as it happened. A breakup drove me to move from the US to Australia now live here with my partner of eight years. Nice that worked out well. Oh. I'm going to have to do a cardly revenge. Sign my ex's email up to all sorts of advertising and porn, etc. That's pretty funny. That is pretty funny. I had one that it wasn't a romantic relationship, but she signed her ex-boss up to volunteer for Destiny Church with her home address. Stop. That's so funny. Oh my god. Okay. My friend sent my ex elephant poop from online. Apparently you can order elephant poop. Stop! It's so funny. How does that get through customs, man? Okay, there's a couple of clean the toilet with his toothbrush ones in here. And there's quite a lot of fucked the best friends. It was kind of a go-to. I like the pity ones. Those are my favorites. Oh my gosh. taking one of every sock they owned and pairing up the leftovers, surprise. What? And pair it? What do you mean? Like they took one of every sock and then paired up the leftovers so that they didn't know that they were odd socks just left there. So every time they opened this, like unrolled the socks, it would be like another odd one. That is such a nightmare. Yeah, there's a lot of angry people too, I must say. There's a lot of car damage. stop yeah whenever we ask whenever we ask the audience something like this we thought we always have a chat beforehand saying like yeah if we just ask for break up revenge we're gonna get some really hardcore stuff which isn't particularly funny or always worth it like I'm all about taking the taking the high road but I actually there was a post in another Facebook group that I saw and someone was asking, they wanted some petty advice and they said, like my friend's ex has just found out that he was cheating the entire seventh month relationship, like has the receipts. The other lady got played as well, she didn't know about it either and she was asking for inspiration on like petty things they could do for revenge because they don't want anything. They don't actually want to inflict any damage on anyone. Give us some suggestions. Some suggestions. Someone said, oh my God, I've been wanting to do this to someone, but I inquired about solar panels maybe three years ago and I literally get three to four calls a day. It drives me mental. I've asked for my number to be removed, but it doesn't happen. Just sign his mobile number up. Someone said, you can actually sign people up for a free visit from Jehovah's Witnesses saying you'd like to hear more about them and select a time that they're normally home so that they'll show up. That's so funny. This girl says also that she bludged off his Spotify account for six months post-breakup. I love that felt like revenge for her. Someone says... If you throw rubber bands in someone's front yard, you've essentially got to pick them up one by one to remove them all. They're really hard to suck up in vacuums. So Oh my gosh, that's great. That is great. Strip the house bare, including cereal containers. Stop. That sounds like a lot of admin. And you've got to be inside their house. Yeah, yeah. This. Lady says anytime someone asks for my number and I'm not interested I just give them to my exes. I just give them my exes number. Oh my gosh, that is so good. That's such an easy one that why didn't I think of that? My ex cheated on me during our four year relationship. I slept with everyone he accused me of cheating with. Stole mail from his litter box. I find it so funny that like What are we going to do? And then like, yes, we're going to go still. So wild. Like, oh yeah, sorry. I just like, yeah, I find it fascinating. Like the conversation that must go on, like, I know what we'll do. Steals a male. No. Someone says here, sign them up to their most hated sporting teams mailing list so they get bombarded with promotional mail and emails. Oh my gosh, that makes me just wanna prank my son for a lull and do that. That's so funny. Another idea someone suggested is to get lots of keys and attach their phone number to the keys. and scatter them all around the city, so he'll be receiving calls from really well-intentioned people saying they've found their keys and have no idea how or why. Oh my gosh, these are great ideas those people are coming up with. Yeah, I obviously didn't, I maybe didn't word this properly. I'll just refresh and see if other ones have come in. But yes, we have some violence coming through. I threw his favourite hoodie off the bridge. Yeah, it really evoked some emotion, people. Fair enough. Someone's, someone's, oh my god. Ah. Found out my ex of six years was cheating. I made him call his mum and tell her. I know. Oh no, that falls under violence. I don't know why I found that funny. It was funny. Three. three eggs at M while he bites two. The energy that goes into some of these, like I think I'd definitely go for a digital option, you know, just like punch someone's email address into something or a phone number somewhere, but like to the extent of having to go and like buy eggs, be in the right place, throw them, like the effort is way too high. So it's. Someone said, man's cheated on me with my best friend. Two years later, they broke up. I made him fall in love with me again and then I dumped him. Ha ha ha. That's a bit... I'm like, to me, all you've done is waste your own time. I don't understand. Like no one wins in that situation. No, that's all I was gonna say. It's like that. You lost time there. Oh my goodness. Wow, okay. Let's wrap that up there. That was very funny and as per usual, some rogue responses from the audience, which is just great to see. But hopefully you got a laugh out of those petty stories. And if you want to see more, you can head over to our Facebook group, Girls Get Off Uncensored. We're on Instagram at girlsgetoff or ggo.burner. You can also check us out online at girlsgetoff.com and make sure you leave a review wherever you're listening to this podcast. Thank you very much.